Joy on the Path of Service
What Came from Getting Tired
By Sharron Mendel, Director of Religious Education
For three years, I've had the privilege of helping to nurture a little meditation group. Every week, we gather to sit, to walk, to study, and to share mindfully. Over time, we've seen each other through personal and family crises such as divorce or cancer. We've shared silent moments watching the sun set near Oak Mountain. We've delighted in the sound of bats flying overhead, and we've appreciated the roses blooming for another season.
It's an honor, really, being in the sort of safe and intimate space that comes with sharing silence together, week after week. It's a joy to watch someone open up, to witness another person take on a new role, or to learn a new song.
But recently, I got tired. Some wonderful changes in my personal life meant I just didn't have the same energy to put toward the group. Any of the parents reading this can relate, I am sure. In fact, anyone who's been through any sort of major life change knows this feeling.
Weekly emails I used to delight in sending began to feel like an obligation. So I stopped sending them. And you know what? The world didn't end. People still kept coming!
Setting up and leading the group also began to feel like a chore. So I started asking others for help. At first, they didn't know what to do.
Discouraged, I reached out to a mentor for support. “What are you so tired of?” he asked. Patiently, he listened deeply to my response, then offered a few suggestions. Some were practical, in terms of how to streamline the workload. Some were wise. He asked what brought me the most joy along the way, and what I needed to sustain me as the leader. Ha! I hadn't thought of these questions! Some were completely unexpected: had I ever been tested for allergies? He'd recently learned that allergies were a direct cause of his recurrent springtime exhaustion. He left me with some excellent pointers about how to cultivate leadership.
After we got off the phone, I typed up instructions and began showing the other “regulars” just what to do, and how. And you know what? Although they are sometimes nervous and scared at first, they lead so beautifully!
Everyone in our group feels so nourished by the freshness these “new leaders” bring. I feel supported and invigorated. Though I don't yet have children of my own, I got a glimpse of the way my sister and brother-in-law felt the day my nephew first made the sign for milk, or the day he picked up a spoon and began feeding himself.
There was one thing my mentor said in that phone conversation that struck me the most deeply: “Yes, there is work to do. That is part of the job of leading a group like this. But don't forget about joy on the path of service. There is also great joy in doing this kind of work.”
Ah, yes. Joy on the path of service. Hopefully, we all know that feeling, right? Ideally, this (rather than a sense of guilt, or obligation) is what leads us to lend a hand, share a skill, offer a gift, or take on a new challenge. Or perhaps even if we are motivated by guilt or obligation, if we are lucky, we discover our own joy along the way.
Think it about it for a second. So many of the challenges I've been facing with that meditation group are so similar to the challenges folks face every day, whether as parents, students, workers, volunteers, or something else. Knowing that we've all got these challenges, I've been on a scavenger hunt, of sorts, to look for evidence of people serving joyfully.
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Scavenger hunt: where is our joyful service?
Some of the RE Teachers have shared moments of joy with me recently. Here's what Lauren Lanehart , who often works with the Nursery/Toddler and Preschool Groups, had to say: “My job is to provide a safe and open environment in which the children can develop, stretch and grow on their own. . .following this philosophy has created a closer bond between the kids and me, and it gives me the chance to enjoy their creativity, energy, innocence and everything that makes them the little rascals they are in its truest and purest form. . .I just love the kids for what they say, how they act, what colors they like, their senses of humor, etc.”
On Earth Day, it was pure delight, after a “Going Green” slideshow presentation led by Kara Harrison , to watch all ears open wide to listen as Ricardo Rouco proposed to a group of kids ranging from Lower Elementary to Middle Schoolers the idea of starting a “Don't Pollute” Club . One by one, children of all ages offered their suggestions for ways to take good care of the Earth. In the end, we split into three groups to go on nature walks with the intention to pick up trash. Along the way, we found fuzzy caterpillars, wildflowers, pinecones that once housed peanut butter and birdseed, and a woodpecked tree stump. We learned a little more about each other and had a grand adventure. Like many grand adventures, we lost track of time a bit, so apologies to parents who were nervously wondering where their little ones were when the service got finished a little early and we were still traipsing through the woods!
Also on Earth Day, we had a “Playground Raising Day.” Led by new member and landscape architect Trey Tarrant, quite a crew showed up to affix fort floorboards, move mulch, plant trees, and build raised beds for gardening. Some were RE Parents, some were Justice Committee members, some were friends and family who don't normally attend church here, and some were friends and members who just wanted to be outside working on a glorious day. It was a beautiful time for people to gather as a community to create something for the younger members of our community.
These are just recent examples of people serving joyfully. No doubt you can think of your own examples, whether from RE this year or other endeavors in which you've participated. If you'd like to share your stories, I'd love to hear them!
Looking ahead: more opportunities to serve
As your new Director of Religious Education, I'm always curious to know what you and yours love. Does storytelling make you happy? Perhaps baking cookies with kids lights you up. Maybe handling creepy crawlies is your idea of fun. You may be a master gardener, or an expert at making green eggs and ham. Looking at the big picture or planning events might be your thing, or perhaps it's shopping you adore. Whatever it is, we've got plenty of ways you can get involved in Religious Education in the months to come.
You don't need to be a parent. You don't need to teach every Sunday (although if you'd like to try your hand at teaching this Summer, or if you're interested in teaching next year, by all means let me know!). You don't need to know everything there is to know about Religious Education.
You do need to share with me what you love. If you work with the kids, you'll need to talk with me, fill in an application, go through a background check, and have your references checked, so we can make sure everyone stays safe and well. You do need to have a thirst for the taste of joyful service. And you do need to be prepared for what's going on in Religious Education to surprise and delight you from time to time.
In closing, I invite you to reflect on the kinds of service that bring you joy. If you like, you are welcome to share your stories, dreams, challenges, and ideas. Together, we can build a playground, a community, a challenging and nurturing place where we and the young people we love can learn and grow together.
Interested? Contact me at 945-8109 or dre@uucbham.org to find a way we can get you, your gifts, and your family involved in our Religious Education Program.
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Thank You * Thank You * Thank You
• Our dedicated teachers, childcare workers, and SEEC Members , who pour so much of their time, love, and creativity into this program. • Trey Tarrant and the Playground Raisers , who sweated long hours under the hot sun so the little ones will have a fun place to play and learn. • Carla Craft and the Passover Seder Crew , who helped us learn the story of the liberation of the Jews from slavery in Egypt, all while sharing a delicious dinner! • Dana Poss for being a fearless and fabulous Youth Advisor! • Carrie Crenshaw for inviting others to share in the joy of service. • Jessica York for sharing her wit and wisdom with a new DRE. • Our Sunday Supervisors for coming up with creative solutions to the inevitable hitches that come up on any given Sunday. • The RE Parents for bringing your kids week after week so we can all learn, grow, and play together. • Trudy Brower and Ruth Vann Lilliann for paving the way so that everyone can be included, and so that everyone can benefit from the gifts that those who appear “different” bring. • Bob Clifton and the Building Committee for taking care of all sorts of things behind the scenes. • Kara Harrison for nurturing the seed of stewardship in our young people. • The High School Youth Group for their Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Service. • Jeanne Weaver for a wonderful book about the history of the Liberal Religious Educator's Association. • Thomas Lower, Ted Kluz, Suzanne Ashe, and Erica Anderson, Kay Emfinger, for sharing their knowledge and experience in Sunday classes. • Arden Craft, Julia and Amelia Mendel , and all the other little ones who help with the RE Program in ways big and small. •
Thank you all for being there.
Be well,
Sharron Mendel
Director of Religious Education
Unitarian Universalist Church of Birmingham
A member congregation of the Unitarian Universalist Association
Location: 4300 Hampton Heights Drive · Birmingham, Alabama · 35209 · U.S.A
Mailing Address: P.O. Box 19786 · Birmingham, AL 35219
Phone: (205) 945-8109 · Fax: (205) 945-8111
E-mail: office@uucbham.org
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All Rights Reserved.